Jack Elfrink Dot Com

Everybody knows that if the party gets to loud, sooner or later the cops will show up. Everybody also knows that if the cops show up, the host always gives the same excuse. “I know what this looks like officer, but trust me. Thats not what is happening”.

It is exactly what is happening here in my home city of Pittsburgh. This week, the case entered federal court.

You can read up on it yourself at  but I will try and give the basics of the story. Guy hosts a concert and has a few hundred people show up on his land. The concerts are wild. He has (supposedly) had George Clinton play there at one time. Other acts have included Urban Funk Ordinance, Tycoon Dog and Donna the Buffalo. He charges $50 a person to get in. The neighbors gripe about the noise (and the parking) so the cops show up. Guy who owns the land says that what he is realy doing is not holding concerts. He is holding….. wait for it ….. church services!

You cant make up news like this.

So the guy holding these concerts all of a sudden claims that since the cops are trying to shut him down that it is a volition of his first amendment right of freedom of religion. The county says its just a simple matter of a zoning violation and that the property is not suited toward whats been going on. Guy claims the zoning ordnance is just an excuse and that he is being persecuted because of his faith.

Sounds rather ridiculous? Sure it does. But compare it to Whipstock in Michigan in 2004. Guy hosts a BDSM convention and has a few hundred people show up on his land. He has a few guest lectures on BDSM related topics that people come there to see. Charges $35-$60 to get in. The neighbors gripe about the noise (and the parking) so the cops show up. He claims that what he is actually doing is not holding a BDSM convention. He is holding ….. wait for it ….. a charity fundraising picnic.

A judge calls bullshit and cites zoning regulations. Places restrictions on the number of people that can show up and what commerce can go on since they are not zoned in a commerce district. Guy claims the zoning ordnance is just an excuse and that he is being persecuted because of his sexual orientation.

So what is the difference between the so called “church” here next to me in Pittsburgh and the so called “picnic” two years ago in Michigan? Well, with the church everyone knows that there honestly is no religious persecution happening. Its just a legal trick to get around the zoning laws. With the picnic in Michigan, people are actually paranoid enough to think that they really are being persecuted.

I worked with a guy once who was just absolutely over the top into thinking that everything that happened in the world was “whitie” keeping “the black man” down. This guy refused to shoot pool because he said that it was oppressive. The white ball had to knock down all the colored balls. And they saved the black one for last. He explained that was just a hidden message by The Man trying to say that only whites deserve to stay up. I thought the guy was an idiot. I told him as much and he just said that I refused to see the truth.

I moved away so I don’t know whatever became of him. But I can well imagine him holding a party at his house and the neighbors calling the cops because of the noise (and cars blocking the driveway). When the cops show up he says that the noise and traffic are just excuses and that the real reason the cops are there is because he is black.

The paranoid mind will always think that the world is out to get them. Even in situations where the world isn’t out to get them, they will take any event that happens at all and go searching for the “hidden meaning” that proves the world is out to get them. The secret truth behind the event that only they can really see. Try and reason with the paranoid mind and you get told that you simply can’t see the hidden truth.

Is the hidden truth behind the “picnic” in Michigan that everyone just hates kinky folks?

Well, one news report quoted the neighbors as saying “This is on a big scale. It’s not a couple of people beating each other in their basement.” Does this mean the neighbors don’t care what other people do behind closed doors and are only griping because the size of the event? Or is the paranoid mind right in claiming the hidden meaning is that the neighbors just hate everything that has to do with sex?

Another news report quoted the neighbors as saying “It’s quiet here. We don’t need this kind of thing.” Does this mean the neighbors are just upset by the noise generated by hundreds of people and don’t care if a smaller number of people do whatever turns them on in the privace of their own home? (Remember, the judge didn’t tell them they had to stop totally, just to limit the size and not run it as a business). Or is the paranoid mind right in claiming the hidden meaning is that the whole county is just a bunch of hate mongers who cant stand anything having to do with sex.

Even a paranoid mind should realize that if the party gets to loud, sooner or later the cops will show up.

This entry was posted on Sunday, July 9th, 2006 at 7:06 am and is filed under Previous blog. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.