Jack Elfrink Dot Com

If you are a kid, stop reading now. Seriously. Im making you pinky swear. You have to be of the appropriate age before you go any further. Your parents are going to be really fucking pissed if they found out you saw this. So stop reading now.

Ok, nothing but adults left now? Right. So here is what I have to say. Santa Claus is not real. If you are a kid and you are still reading this, Im sorry for ruining your childhood.

Now did I just violate federal anti-obscenity law by posting that? Specificity, is it againt the Child Online Protection Act? Saying Santa is not real is certinaly material that is harmful to minors and many parents would wish to shield their children from viewing stuff like that on the internet. And as far as I know, no parental control system exists that would block out the truth about Santa Claus.

The purpose of internet obscenity laws, at least in theory, is to ‘fill in the gaps’ that parents cant cover. The legal debate is been primarily focused on whether or not filtering software operates better than government bureaucracy. The government claims it can do a better job. Self proclaimed ‘free speech’ advocates claim that filtering software does a better job. But for this specific example there is no point debating filtering software because none of them offer a ‘Block websites saying Santa Claus is not real’ option. Besides, this website isnt regesterted with any of the major filtering programs in the first place.

“But thats not porn” I hear you cry. Chanslash fan fiction not withstanding, talking about Santa Claus dosent exactly appeal to the prurient interest. However, this is a website dedicated to perverted sex acts. When I google for the definition of prurient intrest, I get that it is ‘A morbid, degrading and unhealthy interest in sex, as distinguished from a mere candid interest in sex.’ Now I dont consider myself to be 24/7, I dont have a black hankerchif in my back pocket, and I argue vigorously against anyone trying to label me as ‘lifestyle’ BDSM. However, I do make sex toys for a living. Do I have an unhealthy interest in sex? Or is my intrest merely candid?

In any event, it is harmful to children. Parents want to block it, and I offer no method of doing so.

The standard escape clause on obscenity is to claim it has social value. A medical textbook. Michelangelo’s David. I might be able to claim that me talking about Santa Claus not being real has some form of political value. But thats a stretch. So I doubt that I could claim any social value in what I just said.

No. The real dividing line is about money. Internet obscenity law is aimed directly at businesses. You have to be engaged in selling it, or promoting that you are selling it, in order for the law to apply. Now I will admit fully that the only reason I have a blog at all is to be spam for me selling bondage ropes on my other website. That falls rather clearly under the ‘commercial purposes’ clause. So it looks like I did violate federal law after all.

So now what? I am hauled off to prison where I am thrown into a cell and left to rot for years and years and years? Probably not. Imprisonments for violating the Child Online Protection Act is 6 months. And thats the maximum. Factor in time served, early parole, and maybe a bit of leniency, and those six months vanish.

What kicks ya in the teath is the fine. Fifty thousand dollars. And on top of that another fifty thousand dollars as civil penalty. Thats compounded once daily. Three milion dollars a month. No wonder the law is targeted toward businesses.

Thats really what its all about in the end. Follow the money. The Child Online Protection Act has about as much to do with protecting children who are online as the Defense of Marriage Act has to do with defending marriage. There are only two things I know for sure: I have money and the government wants it. Porn laws are not some prudish driven morality buy people uptight over sex who are trying to gain control over what people do in the bedroom. Its the greed of government wanting to put as much of the economy as they can under their own jurisdiction.

….. when economic liberties are abridged or destroyed, all other liberties are abridged or destroyed with them. “Power over a man’s subsistence,” as Alexander Hamilton reminded us, “is power over his will.”

This entry was posted on Saturday, June 30th, 2007 at 5:23 am and is filed under law. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.